to you blog followers and readers of mine.
I haven't been the best lately at posting.
That is about to change very soon.
Keep warm.
Or cool.
Or comfortable, wherever you are. :)
1.31.2011
1.29.2011
26, 27, 28, 29 of 365 (in no particular order)
I cheated on these four days.
They were taken today.
Don't be hatin'.
Today
I am going to be outside.
and catch up on my 365.
Haha, I've been slacking lately.
Don't judge me.
Good day, world. :)
and catch up on my 365.
Haha, I've been slacking lately.
Don't judge me.
Good day, world. :)
1.26.2011
1.25.2011
It's a beautiful day for a picnic
LOOK!
My lovely friend brought me back my favorite candy bar in the world: a Picnic.
She lives in Ireland and was over yonder for the Christmas holidays.
I am so so so so so so so so SOOOOOO excited.
That's why my face looks like that....
Oh, and yes, that is blue paint on my neck.
I'm a weirdy.
For my birthday, *cough August 19 cough* if anyone wants to just ship me a box of these babies from London, I would be more than happy.
And would also be eternally indebted to you.
*sigh* Picnic bars taste like a scrumptious afternoon in London.
My lovely friend brought me back my favorite candy bar in the world: a Picnic.
She lives in Ireland and was over yonder for the Christmas holidays.
I am so so so so so so so so SOOOOOO excited.
That's why my face looks like that....
Oh, and yes, that is blue paint on my neck.
I'm a weirdy.
For my birthday, *cough August 19 cough* if anyone wants to just ship me a box of these babies from London, I would be more than happy.
And would also be eternally indebted to you.
*sigh* Picnic bars taste like a scrumptious afternoon in London.
1.24.2011
When everything isn't okay
Life hits me in the face, quite a lot more than I'd appreciate. And, I mean, it's nothing I can't handle, ya know?
It just gets annoying.
I realize that times when I feel like quitting are just times to keep going strong. To not give up. But some days, curling up in a ball and crying and shutting out the world seems like the easiest thing to do. I feel so alone here. And that's mainly my own fault. I have not stepped out of my comfort zone lately to try and make friends. I am afraid of being rejected, of having people dislike me from the beginning. And although that's never really happened, I still fear it.
I fear making a joke that nobody laughs at. I fear saying something and having people look at me like I'm weird. That's why I keep to myself. That's why I listen instead of speak.
I'm a sophomore in college. School is old news to me. It's, sadly, already become a routine, especially this semester. I'm no longer having fun learning. I'm apathetic.
My three best friends(and seemingly only friends) from college are all studying abroad this semester, leaving me to myself.
My boyfriend of nearly a year lives an hour and a half away, which really isn't that far, but when I feel like he's the only person I have at times, it's like traveling across the globe.
My mom tells me to reach out and be friendly. I know I can do that, but the question is, when? When am I going to get out of this ongoing slump? When am I going to invite someone over for coffee or tea? When am I going to suck it up and be proactive?
I do not know.
My dad says it's okay to be alone. And I realize that, but it freaking hurts.
It sucks not being able to see my best friend, Marielle, whenever I want.
It sucks not being able to hug Ethan whenever I want.
It sucks not feeling welcome. Or when I am invited to something, I feel like I'm invited out of obligation.
It sucks not knowing what to do with myself, so I choose to get on the internet for hours and hours a day, ultimately giving myself a headache and a crappy mood.
I cannot wait for this semester to pass. I'm ready to move out of Tulsa and onto the next chapter in my life--UCO. It's not a private school like TU. It's a lot bigger than TU. There are tons more people there than at TU. But I am so excited for something new. I'm ready to, in a sense, reinvent myself. For the better. I'm ready to be friendly and outgoing. But not that outgoing so that other people can't get a word in. The good outgoing.
I'm so ready for the transition.
This is a time of growth, and I realize that. I believe that this state I'm in is all a part of God's plan for me. I'll come out of this slump knowing that I am stronger. I've got to just keep focusing on all the blessings in my life, even when it's incredibly hard.
I know this isn't like my normal posts.
But, I needed to be honest and get that out, whatever it was.
Phewww.
It just gets annoying.
I realize that times when I feel like quitting are just times to keep going strong. To not give up. But some days, curling up in a ball and crying and shutting out the world seems like the easiest thing to do. I feel so alone here. And that's mainly my own fault. I have not stepped out of my comfort zone lately to try and make friends. I am afraid of being rejected, of having people dislike me from the beginning. And although that's never really happened, I still fear it.
I fear making a joke that nobody laughs at. I fear saying something and having people look at me like I'm weird. That's why I keep to myself. That's why I listen instead of speak.
I'm a sophomore in college. School is old news to me. It's, sadly, already become a routine, especially this semester. I'm no longer having fun learning. I'm apathetic.
My three best friends(and seemingly only friends) from college are all studying abroad this semester, leaving me to myself.
My boyfriend of nearly a year lives an hour and a half away, which really isn't that far, but when I feel like he's the only person I have at times, it's like traveling across the globe.
My mom tells me to reach out and be friendly. I know I can do that, but the question is, when? When am I going to get out of this ongoing slump? When am I going to invite someone over for coffee or tea? When am I going to suck it up and be proactive?
I do not know.
My dad says it's okay to be alone. And I realize that, but it freaking hurts.
It sucks not being able to see my best friend, Marielle, whenever I want.
It sucks not being able to hug Ethan whenever I want.
It sucks not feeling welcome. Or when I am invited to something, I feel like I'm invited out of obligation.
It sucks not knowing what to do with myself, so I choose to get on the internet for hours and hours a day, ultimately giving myself a headache and a crappy mood.
I cannot wait for this semester to pass. I'm ready to move out of Tulsa and onto the next chapter in my life--UCO. It's not a private school like TU. It's a lot bigger than TU. There are tons more people there than at TU. But I am so excited for something new. I'm ready to, in a sense, reinvent myself. For the better. I'm ready to be friendly and outgoing. But not that outgoing so that other people can't get a word in. The good outgoing.
I'm so ready for the transition.
This is a time of growth, and I realize that. I believe that this state I'm in is all a part of God's plan for me. I'll come out of this slump knowing that I am stronger. I've got to just keep focusing on all the blessings in my life, even when it's incredibly hard.
I know this isn't like my normal posts.
But, I needed to be honest and get that out, whatever it was.
Phewww.
1.22.2011
If you love love, like me...
Or you just want to be inspired, these are for you. :)
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
1.21.2011
Random ramblings!
I love orange juice with pulp.
I'm listening to Bon Iver on vinyl.
Two of my friends are playing at Joe Mamma's tonight, and Ethan and I are going. Joe Mamma's has the best pizza in the world. No lie.
I can't wait for summer. For so many reasons.
A few main ones: to wear sundresses everyday.
To cook in the kitchen with the windows open.
And to play outside and swim. :)
I went thrifting today and grabbed two shirts and a neato pillow. And I went grocery shopping and probably spent too much. But hey, I'll definitely eat it all. :P
Tonight, after Joe Mamma's, we're going to watch 10 Things I Hate About You, thanks to my dear Aubry, because she left it in my room.
I really love bagels.
And I think baby animals, especially lions, deer, and pigs are the cutest thing ever.
I am so so so happy it's the weekend.
Cinnamon and vanilla nut coffe from archer farms (Target) smells SO GOOD
I am going to make paninis (and I know the plural of "panino" is "panini", but it looks funny) sometime this weekend with mozzarella and pesto and tomatoes.
Ethan is here and he's sitting next to me watching Camel spiders attack scorpions. I am now terrified of camel spiders.
I'm in the process, and have been in the process, of making new friends. Already got one dude hooked with friendship: Tim Brown. He's in my improv troupe. Super nice dude. Really funny.
O--|---< <----That's him.
Annnnd, currently, I am one hundred percent happy.
(all images, apart from my photobooth one were found in weheartit.com)
1.20.2011
I have begun a list!
A list of things I want to make.
I shall post them here.
And make them when I feel the desire.
:)
I shall post them here.
And make them when I feel the desire.
:)
20/365
And words from Charlie, whose face is getting pelted by a snowball: "This really hurt my face."
3 little things
I'm thankful for:
1) Cars to get one person to the other.
2) Willing models
3) Ibuprofen
1) Cars to get one person to the other.
2) Willing models
3) Ibuprofen
19/365
Hello, lovelies,
There's approximately sixteen feet of snow outside my apartment window right now. Is class canceled?
Of course not.
Oh well, the light in my room is lovely, and Ethan is coming here tonight. I am a happy girl today.
Here's my 365.
Have a dashing day,
and listen to "poison and wine" by The Civil Wars.
It's been my favorite song for months now.
There's approximately sixteen feet of snow outside my apartment window right now. Is class canceled?
Of course not.
Oh well, the light in my room is lovely, and Ethan is coming here tonight. I am a happy girl today.
Here's my 365.
Have a dashing day,
and listen to "poison and wine" by The Civil Wars.
It's been my favorite song for months now.
1.19.2011
365 and my vintage purse
Hey ya'll.
(The Okie in me is coming out)
Here's 18 of 365,
19 is on its way soon.
There's a new vintage store near campus. It has wonderful home furnishings and what not and then a whole lot of purses and jewelry and clothes. I want everything in there. But, alas, I am jobless, and therefore cannot spend any (more) money.
Now, please excuse me,
I must get to watching Pretty Little Liars.
(The Okie in me is coming out)
Here's 18 of 365,
19 is on its way soon.
Aaand, here's the vintage purse I bought today. It's woven and leather and wonderful. :) (pardon the photobooth picture)
Now, please excuse me,
I must get to watching Pretty Little Liars.
3 little things
Today, I'm thankful for:
1) Diet coke
2) My parents who provide for me
3) Having friends spread across the world.
1) Diet coke
2) My parents who provide for me
3) Having friends spread across the world.
1.18.2011
3 little things
I'm thankful for:
1) A bed.
2) Forgiving professors (I was an hour late to Design because I forgot is started at 1.)
3) Sprite.
1) A bed.
2) Forgiving professors (I was an hour late to Design because I forgot is started at 1.)
3) Sprite.
1.17.2011
1.15.2011
New Idea
I think that every day, or as often as I blog,
I'm going to do a post of a few things I'm thankful for.
1) Wireless internet.
2) The heat of Ethan's body. (That may sound inappropriate, but I promise it's not supposed to be)
3) Being alive.
I'm going to do a post of a few things I'm thankful for.
1) Wireless internet.
2) The heat of Ethan's body. (That may sound inappropriate, but I promise it's not supposed to be)
3) Being alive.
1.14.2011
1.13.2011
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